Chasing Contentment

Thursday, October 7

Today... ah, today. The joy and contentment and gratitude I feel today envelope me. All days are precious. Today is a tangible reminder of how precious life is... my life.

A year ago today, my doctor told me I was very sick, that if he didn't go ahead and deliver my daughter - seven weeks too soon - and deliver her within moments, I would be so sick that I would bleed to death on the delivery table. I don't know that the impact of his words hit me until much later. My first thoughts were of Eliza, of how she wasn't ready yet. Mike says he's glad I was thinking of her because he wasn't, which makes me smile.

My daughter was born a year ago today. I met her a year ago tomorrow. She lived more than 24 hours before I ever saw her, touched her skin. So much difficulty surrounded us all in those days, but the Lord was carrying us.

My mother came to visit the day before Eliza was born, and she was able to stay with Griffin. My friend, Stacy, came to my hospital room moments before the doctor arrived to tell us what would happen, and she was able to stay with Mike so he wouldn't be alone during the surgery. She happens to be trained for these situations, and she was the very best person to be with him at that time. She was also one of my greatest encouragers while Eliza was in the NICU.

My great-aunt Lynda Jane, who travels with her work, was driving through town that night and came to my room late that evening as Mike was leaving to go home to get things for us both to have at the hospital. She stayed with me while he was gone so I wouldn't be alone.

So many things happened in the days leading up to Eliza's birth and in the days after that renewed my conviction that the Lord is in control of all. I am so grateful that my doctor is a strong, competent man who recognized what was wrong with me and was capable of treating me. I am humbled that God chose to give me this second chance on life.

I pray that I make good use of this time He gave me, that I love my husband and children well enough, that I encourage my friends well enough, that I provide myself open to whatever God has for me, and that I strive to be all that He wants me to be. Outside of my salvation, I cannot think of a gift God has given me that is greater than this opportunity to be with my family still.

Happy first birthday, my dear Eliza.

[  posted by Chel on Thursday, October 07, 2004  ]


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