Chasing Contentment

Tuesday, November 1

It's a grey, dreary day outside which is fine by me because it matches my weary, melancholy mood.

My doctor changed my allergy shots about a month ago, and I've been sick ever since, and I'm terribly tired of it all. When I get really worn out or just plain worn down, I fall into unhappy and unhealthy thought patterns that don't do anything to encourage or uplift me. I wrote yesterday about how encouraging others comes easily to me. Encouraging myself, not so much.

Last night, as I was picking Eliza up from daycare, I was thinking about how so many women - myself included - have this idea that if this or that in our lives was different, our lives would be completely transformed. And in some cases, that's probably true. But in other cases, it's far from the truth.

If I think about my life and about what would really be different if my this or that were to be real, I can't really think of anything other than the completely superficial that would be different.

And maybe that should remind me that God loves and accepts me just as I am now. And if He does, I'm pretty sure I should, too.

[  posted by Chel on Tuesday, November 01, 2005  ]


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